The first thing I noticed was how the position fit in the same niche as psychiatrist or prostitute, in that the people who came up to our counter were frequently letting us in on the personal secrets they shared with almost no one else. I do know that I never once rented a video from our very large Lesbian section to a woman, much less an actual lesbian. In fact, my ideal choice would be a position in which I got paid to do as little as humanly possible. This might seem a bit OCD, until you found out he rented 16 movies at a time, which probably did make it hard to keep track. By far the most bizarre part of the shift was the mandatory novelty inventory, which required me to print a list of every dildo, vibrator, pocket pussy, tube of cherry flavored anal lube, etc. Source was actually a chain of stores all identically designed to be as open and well lit as possible in a clear attempt to both appeal to couples and discourage any attempts at public masturbation. But despite this past history of failure, I still got excited when I found a want ad in the paper for a video store position that was just a few blocks away from where I was living. That was odd, but what made it odder was the fact that his choices were always completely random. Then it was all I could do to stop myself from turning into Barry White.
Then it was all I could do to stop myself from turning into Barry White. The first thing I noticed was how the position fit in the same niche as psychiatrist or prostitute, in that the people who came up to our counter were frequently letting us in on the personal secrets they shared with almost no one else. I really only remember the weirdos. My distaste for these ridiculous assumptions did admittedly change on the rare occasions when an attractive woman asked the very same question. I had no problem with working graves, having been a habitual night owl since birth. In other words, I wanted to be a video store clerk. I vowed at that moment to be much more respectful and discrete. Once I figured out nothing was ever actually done with the inventories I was supposed to do each night, I started faking them while I sat down and watched videos I brought from home. One week it would be a gay DVD, the next it would be one that featured extremely overweight women, which would be followed by a vanilla bondage video and then a transgender flick. That was undeniably creepy. The next day I found myself being trained in the ways of adult video store clerking. By far the most bizarre part of the shift was the mandatory novelty inventory, which required me to print a list of every dildo, vibrator, pocket pussy, tube of cherry flavored anal lube, etc. This might seem a bit OCD, until you found out he rented 16 movies at a time, which probably did make it hard to keep track. Another reminder of porn's creepy side was the saga of one particular tape kept in the part of the store devoted to the crappiest of the crappy discount titles. That said, those guys have all sort of melted into a forgettable blob memory-wise. I barely lasted two months. Three months in, I got a call from an acquaintance asking me if I wanted to apply for a writing position at the local publishing company he worked for. In fact, my ideal choice would be a position in which I got paid to do as little as humanly possible. Fifteen minutes later I was no longer unemployed, but the catch was that I would have to accept the Turned out someone hid the fifth one behind the penis enlarging pumps. One gentleman would always pepper me with questions about how he could start his own porn company, as if I had been personally responsible for producing the videos he was renting. Within three weeks I was a full-time working writer. Truthfully many of the strangest moments on the job had nothing to do with the fact that I was surrounded by pornography, but rather the standard weirdness that comes from working with the public in any capacity. It rocks their world. I did the math and figured out that at an average length of 90 minutes, it would take him 24 hours to watch all 16 movies, which he would probably have to split up into 8 hour shifts for the 3 days he had the movies.
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